these days

I decided to update this since it's been awhile. There have been some tough moments for me during the last couple of weeks. A really low point was Tuesday of last week. I went to a credit union and a bank to get pre-approved for a car loan. Well lets just say that I didn't get very good news. Basically I won't get approved for a loan (or at least not for theamount I need) because my debt to income ratio is too high. This means that my debt (rent, student loans, and credit card payments) is too high of a precentage of my monthly gross income. This news really upset me. I ended up calling my parents crying. After talking with them for a while, I figured that I might just wait a little longer before getting a car. And when I do get one, I might not be able to get a new one; I might have to go with a used one instead. It was just really hard because I had got my hopes up that I would have a new car by this time. Part of the reason I was so upset, was that I knew I shouldn't get my hopes up too much, because usually something goes wrong. It's also been hard to explain to people that I told I was going to get a new car, that I'm not going to be getting one right now. I've been trying to explain it in a quick way that doesn't make me sound dumb for not really looking into the money situation more in-depth beforehand. Now I also know that I'll have to explain it and rehash it all with my counselor at my appointment next week.

I've also had a fews days in the last couple of weeks that I've felt really lonely again. Part of it is because Kate wasn't around last week, so I didn't really have anyone to do stuff with. Thankfully I was working in the preschool 4 hours a day, so that consumed some of my time. Also, I was invited over a to some church friend's house for dinner on the 4th of July. If I hadn't been invited by them, I don't think I would have done anything. I would have ended up just sitting at home. Also the other night (Wednesday) I was really down, because I thought that Kate was made at me. I thought that she was ignoring me. I assumed that because she wasn't answering the texts that I had sent a few hours before, that she was mad at me and ignoring me. I, of course, cried over this. Part of me knew that I shouldn't automatically assume that, but another part of me just felt like crying. It was another hard night. I ended up being wrong. She wasn't mad at me and she wasn't ignoring me. She had just been busy with her husband. I just wish I could have not let things bother me so much.

School meetings start one month from today. I've got a lot to get done in tha amount of time. Plus I'm also going to New Mexico in less than 3 weeks. I cannot wait!